Wouldn’t that be cool if we had the ability to just hit the undo button and start over?
We regret things like eating too many sweets, not reading all the books we’ve planned to read, not learning Russian, we regret not going to college, we regret going to college and now having loans. We regret making mistakes, not being prepared enough. We constantly regret. It can becomes an addiction. So why do we regret? Simply put we regret because we think we should have made a better choice then the one we made. We should have picked a better mate. We should have taken that riskier more exciting job, but didn’t. We should have been more disciplined but weren’t. We regret these choices because of the idea path we have in our heads.
It’s a syndrome of coulda, woulda, shoulda.
We all know to take care of our health. We all know to eat better and sleep better and exercise more and blah, blah, blah.
The biggest problem is that we cannot change the choices we’ve already made.
We fall into a trap of comparing the fantasy life we could have versus the life we actually have.
One of my Older cousins who is now 66 has high blood pressure and now suffers from extreme migraines told me “If I could go back, I would start eating better and exercising and I would not stop. I made excuses then. But I had no idea. I regret never starting.”
Regret sucks because we all have this self identity of who we are (perfect in the morning and as you go on your day hard addictions begin to boil). How much more can we handle? If only we chose a different life partner, a different career path, or a healthier food option.
How do we kick the shit out of regret and move on?
The practice of letting go of trying to be perfect and make the perfect choice is impossible friends.
You’re past failures are important. Embrace those failures. Embrace the fact that sometimes we are not always good. Sometimes you are not good. Sometimes you eat too many cookies. Sometimes you drink way too much patron. Sometimes you smoke another cigarette on your drive home when you told yourself you were gonna stop.
It’s all about triggers. What triggers the action?
The drive home from work triggers you to pull out a cigarette. The stress from work triggers you to stress eat and watch Netflix.
Alright regret-elites become aware. Become aware of when you are falling into the trap of these triggers.
Focus on what you’re doing now and how you can learn from those regrets.
This is a choice guys and gals you won’t regret.
1) Truth about kicking regrets ass numero Uno
We are creatures of our environment. Gently let go of those who are not making your life better. We need a good support system to start getting rid of regret. Just like every Hero needs a side kick. Every person needs an accountability group. Join a group on Facebook. Message old friends and tell them about your new goals to not regret anything and tell them about your new dreams.
When we’re in our 20s, the world is so open to opportunity and we’re so short on experience that we cling to the people we meet, even if they’ve done nothing to earn our clingage. But by our 30s we’ve learned that good relationships are hard to come by, that there’s no shortage of people to meet and friends to be made, and that there’s no reason to waste our time with people who don’t help us on our life’s path.
2) Truth about kicking regrets ass numero Dos
YOU CAN’T HAVE EVERYTHING; FOCUS ON DOING A FEW THINGS REALLY WELL.
My wise friend by the name of Google listed in wise quotes and said “Everything in life is a trade-off. You give up one thing to get another and you can’t have it all. Accept that.”
Ask yourself some deep questions and re answer them everyday.
What are tasks that you seem to make a habit of and find easy to do no matter how tired you are?
What is an activity you would pay someone to do everyday?
What are some common traits People or friends say about you?
Make it a habit to answer these finite questions as if you were Goku trying to go super saiyan. You gotta shed some sweat and tears at answering these questions.
3) Truth about kicking regrets ass numero Tres
It’s Opposite Day!
The beautiful thing about being human and living in such a complex and incomprehensible world is that no matter what happens, finding something shitty about it is never too difficult. Right? Our minds are capable of rationalizing almost anything, so why not rationalize how everything is wrong? As I like to say, when life gives you lemonade, make lemons.
Take out a sheet of paper. Write down six of your values.
Current values; (next month they could be different)
Building a sick physique
Creating (blog, vlog, or writing a fitness program)
Hitting my goals
Make 2 million dollars
Start my own business
So I wrote these out and I teared the shit out of the piece of paper and threw it away.
Feels good, right?
You’re taking control of your subconscious. Ever wonder why something you used to deeply care about getting good at suddenly becomes easier the second you you start to care about it less?
It’s a paradoxical. For some crazy odd reason we start to get really good at just making things happen when we care about it less. So this is hard advice to follow but I’m about to leave you with the last guiding thought. “Give less fucks about regret.”
If you’re done reading this and you’re more confused then ever. Good! Sleep on it. Forget everything you just read and let your (subconscious regretful mind of yours lead the way.)